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 EXT. DISPENSARY - DAY Alice sets the finished white board sign in the window. A local, ALAN, sees her and enters the shop. INT. DISPENSARY - DAY Alan comes in and smiles at Alice. ALICE: Can I help you find something? ALAN: (grins) Uh, that depends. On whether you're the real Alice. ALICE: Oh, I don't know how real I am, but Alice is my real name. (off his skeptical look) You want to see my driver's license? ALAN: I believe you. Only...can I speak to the smoking caterpillar? ALICE: (laughs) Sure, but I don't think he really smokes. (At the counter, Providence sees two attractive young Women browsing the store. She notices Mo Joe staring at them.) PROVIDENCE: You pervert. MO JOE: Hey, I can't help it. PROVIDENCE: Like hell you can't. Are they, like, naked? MO JOE: Bikinis. PROVIDENCE: Bikinis... Hmm... (Alice approaches the counter with Alan, who smiles at Providence and holds out his hand to Mo Joe.) ALAN: So you're the owner. (as they shake hands) I'm Alan. I live a few blocks from here. MO JOE: Mo Joe. That's my name. How can I help you? ALAN: Oh, I don't need anything today. I was just appreciating the sign...and the one putting up the sign. Great gimmick. But I am a little concerned that you don't have more customers. I suppose you do a lot of deliveries. PROVIDENCE: Oh, you know. We're still building our customer base. ALAN: You probably get a break in rent, don't you? MO JOE: Not bad. Do you know the owner or something? ALAN: No, but he must have told you about this location...about its weird karma. MO JOE: How's that? ALAN: He didn't tell you. Pretty unscrupulous. MO JOE: What? Just tell me. ALAN: Okay. I've been in Pacific Beach awhile, and I've seen business after business go belly-up in this spot, First a clothing store, then a bar, a cafe, even a hookah lounge. I was thinking good, a dispensary at least ought to be able to make it here... (off Providence's desperate look) ...or not. ALICE: It just takes time. ALAN: That's just it. It shouldn't. It ought to be built-in, especially here in party city. You have all the ingredients, including the cute budtenders-- PROVIDENCE: Budtenders? ALICE: Wait. You don't know what a budtender is? That's us. Like a bartender but with buds. PROVIDENCE: (gives Alice a dirty look; then thoughtfully--) Budtender... ALAN: And you have the cool theme... (indicates Alice) Maybe all you need is some kind of promotional campaign. ALICE: To, like, break the, like, curse. PROVIDENCE: (eyes flash) No problem. We have just the thing. MO JOE: (hand on laptop) This? Oh, but it's not done yet. PROVIDENCE: Not that! I mean that, but first the other thing. (off Mo Joe's blank look) You know! It's called the...the Bodacious Budtenders Pageant. (off curious looks) It'll be like a competition with the other dispensaries, with costume... (indicates Alice) ...and swimsuit... (She gestures toward Women, whose clothes morph into bikinis. This gets blank looks from others and a patient nod from Mo Joe.) PROVIDENCE: And talent, and, uh... (desperately thinking while others wait) And marijuana trivia, you know, like the Gong Show? ALICE: The Gong Show. You mean the Bong Show! (This gets a general laugh; Providence gives Alice a grateful smile. Mo Joe looks like a deer trapped in headlights.) PROVIDENCE: I mean, like, a liberated beauty contest with both men and women competing so it's not sexist...well, not too sexist. (after a beat, to Alan, following a furtive glace at Mo Joe) So. What do you think? ALAN: (grinning) If that doesn't break the curse on this place, nothing will. I look forward to it. Anyway, you have my business. (Smiling at each of them, he turns and leaves. Providence looks at Mo Joe expectantly. Mo Joe is still blown away.) MO JOE: Tell me you didn't think of all that right on the spot. PROVIDENCE: Actually...actually, it's kind of been percolating, I think, you know, in my subconscious, in like bits and pieces. So you think it's a good idea? ALICE: Yeah, it's pretty smart. I can't believe I didn't think of it myself. (Providence looks at her ironically, then laughs in shared amusement.) PROVIDENCE: The Bong Show. Now that's a cool idea.
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